Scared that bedbugs might bite you where you least want it?
Frightened at the thought that a bedbug may lay an egg in your back passage?
Fear not the solution to your unfounded worry is coming soon.
Soon to be available in a variety of sizes:
Very worried
Slightly worried
Rabidly heterosexual male
Don’t worry, yes this is a sarcastic web site created to encourage people to look at the serious facts about bedbugs and to get educated so that they can understand this pest.
This site does however confirm the need for independent efficacy testing of bedbug products free from the bias of inventors and the supply chain as well as the need to make manufacturers and distributors responsible for the use and abuse of their products to ensure accountability within product husbandry.
Our recommended sensible reading includes:
Web site supported by www.Bed-
After years of consumer research and development our world class entomologist Dr Dimpoo Lame has concluded that the BedBugButtPlug (that he invented) is the most amazing product ever and that every “A hole” should have one. We are therefore about to launch our 2012 lecture tour to introduce the product to the world and to make sure that it becomes part of everyone “best practice”. We have even recruited the bedbug worlds most famous story tellers the Brothers Grim to help spread the word and sure that every home is protected with a BedBugButtPlug.
Next Generation Technology:
Following the success of another ridiculous bedbug product on the “Shark Tank” we will be seeking funding on TV for the next generation of product an insecticide impregnated butt plug developed in conjunction with our latest celebrity entomologist Dr Dick Cola. Although inserting insecticide into your rear passage may not seem like a good idea Dr Dick points out that according to the Moovan label its safe to use so long as the area is not occupied for more than 4 hours a day. Given that only elite academic entomologists go around with their heads inserted up their rear passages for more than 4 hours a day it “should be” safe for the public.
Once inserted the off gases are produced which penetrate into every crack and crevice in the room killing all bedbugs. To enhance the effect users can consume a combination of spicy food high fibre as heat and air flow are known to enhance the gas production.
When asked about this new application Dr Cola declared “Its only thanks to a liberal reading of the label can we do this application, after all in the US we are only obliged to follow the instructions and not use common sense, as no label specifically restricts the use of insecticides in microwave ovens we interpret this as meaning we can do what we want”.